A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
The road to success is always under construction.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.